will agree with me, let me have my belly full of that, before 'tis whisked away by that magical wand of

yours.

Pedro. Our great master Hippocrates, north-star and perpetual guide of physic, says in one of his aphorisms, Omais Saturatio Mala, Perdicis autem pessima*[Pedro points with his wand to the several dishes on the table as he surveys it] therefore you must not touch these partridges.-Rabbits are a hairy, furry kind of food, fit only for the frozen stomach of a Laplander; then the onions in which they are smother'd are pernicious to the eyes.-This veal must not stay a moment Jonger on the table-Indeed, had it been neither stewed, roasted, boiled, minced, fricasseed, or marinaded, something perhaps might be said for it."

San. Hold! I have hit the nail upon the head at last— yonder I spy a smoking hot dish of Olla Podrida, a hodge podge, a mixture of all sorts of food; so you can never tell me I shan't there light of something both wholesome and toothsome. Hand it over, hand it over..

Pedro. Absit, absit.

Sancho. Sit still, sit still, I say,

with it.

Pedro. Do you consider, my Lord Governor, that I shall have your life to account for?

San. Villain! you'll have my death to answer for.Dear heart! I'm quite worn out with fatigue and fasting; my tongue's a dried tongue, and my mouth a piece of parchment.-A cup of wine there.

Pedro. "Tis death till I have first examined and corrected it; let me see the glass.

San. Why, what's to come of me? an't I to drink neither?

Pedro. Not till I have allayed the acid quality of the wine, my Lord, and made it fit for your stomach; you are inclining to a hectic and choler-strong liquors destroy the humidum radicale.

Sun. Why, you knavish, unconscionable Paracelsian,

* All repletion is bad, but that of partridges worst of all.

what sort of a governor do you think me, not to eat nor drink? But one word; pray what is your name, friend? Pedro. Sir, I am stiled Doctor Pedro Rezio de Aguero. I am a native of Tirte a fuera, and took my degree in the University of Ossuna.

San. Why then, Doctor Pedro Rezio de Aguero, native of Dirty Furio, and who took your degree in the University of Ossuna, take these plates and dishes at your head; I seize on this fowl, and this bread and bottle, [Snatches up a carving knife] which I will defend to the hour of my death-and you, my good lady and daughter, with the rest that could eat your own dinner and see the governor starv'd, be gone, all, you ungrateful wretches.

[They all run off, calling for help; he throwing the things about, &c.

Enter MESSENGER, hastily.

Mess. Arm, arm, my lord, you are not safe a minute; here's news now come that several thousand Buccaneers, pirates and banditti have enter'd your island; here's a letter too, sent from the Duke to give you notice of the danger. You must prepare for your defence imme

diately.

San. You know I can't read it.

Alonzo. [Reads] Signior Sancho, I have just learned that certain enemies of mine, and of the island, meditate a desperate and furious assault immediately; several spies are about your person, with intent to assassinate you ; take care of yourself, and the charge committed to you; transmit me word what succours you may want; your danger is great. Your friend the Duke.

Enter PEDRO.

Pedro. Oh! unfortunate state of this unhappy island; that because of its wealth and fertility, is perpetually plagued with enemies, who bear a mortal spite to all those that rule; those merciless banditti, and Buccaneers, have taken and flayed three or four of our governors already.

San. They have! A goodly hint for Sancho!

Enter MANUEL.

Man. Noble Don Sancho, the enemy gains ground every moment, therefore come away instantly to the citadel, that we may arm you, and put you at the head of your brave troops, who impatiently expect you.

San. But why all this hurry? Me, do you say? I know no more what belongs to fighting, than a General does of cow-keeping.

Man. They'll come upon us before we have taken up our arms; but it never shall be said, that I stood tamely and saw so famous an island lost; I'll go and defend the gates as long as I can against them.

[Manuel going.

San. Where, where are you going? Man. Going! where the governor ought to be in person; into the heat of battle, amidst fire and smoke, to have a clear view of all our danger. [Exit Manuel.

San. This is the first time I ever knew a man went into smoke to have a clear view of any thing; but, Dr. Dirty Furio, sure you won't leave me to be flayed alive by these bloody Buccaneers?

Pedro. My Lord, my character's at stake.

San. Then go, like an intrepid Quack, and establish it by the death of thousands.

Pedro. 'Tis true, I differ from the soldier in profession.

San. But you agree exactly with him in practice; so away with you, doctor. [Exit Pedro. [Guns fire, shouts, drums, und trumpets.

This comes of nibbling at governments! [shouts louder] Where shall I fly! This way, I know, leads to the garden, and I'll steal off there and hide myself, if 'tis only behind a gooseberry bush. [As he goes to one side of the stage, he stops suddenly, hearing a violent shout from that quarter] Frightful! I was rushing into the lion's mouth, [runs to the opposite side, stopped by another shout] 'tis Out of the frying pan into the fire.I'll jump out of this window [runs to the back of the

stage, but the moment he opens the window, hears a shout.]

Manuel. [without.] Make this breach good; raise those ladders; fire the pitch and rosin, and get some kettles of scalding oil ready.

San. Scalding oil! no doubt to pour down the poor governor's throat.

Pedro. [without.] Deliver up the Governor, and we'll make a truce; bring him out; we know him by his robe; here are an hundred of us have sworn to spit him and roast him alive for an example to all such future governors.

San. Nay, if, like an ermine, I'm known by my skin, even take that amongst you [throws off his robe, they shout again] What shall I do? where shall I hide? I'йl get under the table; A dog's place and a whole skin are better than laced robes and danger. [Hides himself under one of the tables; another shout, then Victoria! Victoria! cried.]

Enter DUKE, PEDRO, MANUEL, &c. &c.

Duke. Thanks, fellow soldiers, for your noble defence of this valuable island.-But all our joys are incomplete, till we receive tidings of the governor.

[Sancho pops out his head. Man. Here is his robe, my Lord. San. Well, what will you have from the Cat but the skin;* but what do I see? it is the Duke himself.

Duke. Go, some of you, and seek him amongst the slain; and if only his head can be found, he who shows me that first, shall be rewarded with a thousand crowns. San. [addressing the Duke.] Then, my Lord, I claim the reward myself.

Duke. What Don Sancho, our much-beloved governor!

Sancho. [Coming from under the table.] No, my Lord, plain Sancho, and no governor.

Alluding to the proverb You can't have more of a Cat than her

Duke. What, do you resign your high office?

San. I do, indeed, my Lord-Beware of Had-I-wist; -Cobler, stick to your last;-There's no making a velvet purse of a pig's ear.-My Lord Duke, I thank you for your kindness, but return you your government back again. I'm not fit to be a Governor, nor to defend Islands or Cities: I know better how to plough, dig, prane and plant vineyards, than to give laws. Every man to his own trade I say, to exercise the calling he was born to.-All I now ask is, give me my wife, my daughter, and Dapple.-Take notice, I have not displaced a tile nor a brick in the island! A poor man I came in, and a poor man I go out of place. It is not every governor that can say the same; nor will a generous people wish a good Governor to go without a fair reward. May THIS ISLAND ever have, and ever deserve, a GOVERNOR who may justly claim what I now humbly sue for,-PUBLIC APPROBATION.

THE END.