Page images
PDF
EPUB

Be ftudious well to imitate

My portly motion, mein, and gate;
Mark my addrefs, and learn my ftile,
When to look fcornful, when to fmile;
Nor fputter out your caths so fast,
fo
But keep your fwearing to the laft.
Then at our leifure we'll be witty,
And in the streets divert the city;
The ladies from the windows gaping,
The children all our motions aping.
Your converfation to refine

I'll take you to fome friends of mine,
Choice fpirits, who employ their parts
To mend the world by ufeful arts ;
Some cleanfing hollow tubes to fpy
Direct the zenith of the fky;
Some have the city in their care
From noxious fteams to purge
the air;
Some teach us in thefe dang rous days
How to walk upright in our ways;
Some whose reforming hands engage
To lafh the lewdnefs of the age;
Some for the publick service
Perpetual envoys to and fro;
Whose able heads fupport the weight
Of twenty minifters of state.

go

We fcorn, for want of talk, to jabber
Of parties o'er our bonny-clabler:

[blocks in formation]

Nor are we ftudious to enquire,
Who votes for manours, who for hire
Our care is to improve the mind
With what concerns all human-kind;
The various fcenes of mortal life,
Who beats her husband, who his wife;
Or how the bully at a stroke

Knock'd down the boy, the lanthorn broke,
One tells the rife of cheese and oatmeal;
Another when he got a hot meal;
One gives advice in proverbs old,
Inftructs us how to tame a fcold;
Or how by almanacks 'tis clear,
That herrings will be cheap this year.
T. Dear Mullinix, I now lament
My precious time fo long mifpent,
By nature meant for nobler ends:
O, introduce me to your friends!
For whom by birth I was defign'd,
'Till politicks debas'd my mind:
I give myself entire to you;
G-- d-- the Whigs, and Tories too,

EPITAPH

HERE continueth to rot

The body of FRANCIS CHARTRES; Who, with an INFLEXIBLE CONSTANCY and INIMITABLE UNIFORMITY of life,

[blocks in formation]

In spite of AGE and INFIRMITIES, In the practice of EVERY HUMAN VICE, Excepting PRODIGALITY and HYPOCRISY: His infatiable AVARICE exempted him from the first,

His matchlefs IMPUDENCE from the fecond.

Nor was he more fingular in the undeviating pravity of his manners, than fuccefsful in accumulating WEALTH:

For, without TRADE OF PROFESSION,
Without TRUST of PUBLICK MONEY,
And without BRIBE-WORTHY SERVICE,
He acquired, or more properly created,
A MINISTERIAL ESTATE.

He was the only perfon of his time Who cou'd CHEAT without the mask of

HONESTY,

Retain his primeval MEANNESS When poffefs'd of TEN THOUSAND a year;

S 4

And,

And, having daily deferv'd the GIBBET for what he did,

Was at laft condemn'd to it for what he could not do.

O indignant reader !

Think not his life useless to mankind! PROVIDENCE conniv'd at his execrable

defigns,

To give to after-ages a confpicuous PROOF and EXAMPLE

Of how small eftimation is EXORBITANT
WEALTH in the fight of GOD, by
his bestowing it on the most UNWOR-
THY OF ALL MORTALS.

Joannes jacet hic Mirandula----cætera norunt Et Tagus et Ganges----forfan et Antipodes.

Apply'd to F. C.

[ocr errors]
[merged small][ocr errors][merged small][merged small][merged small]

PET

ETER complains, that God has given To his poor babe a life fo fhort: Confider, Peter, he's in heaven;

'Tis good to have a friend at court.

γου

ANOTHER.

OU beat your pate, and fancy wit will come:

Knock as you please, there's nobody at home.

[ocr errors]

* EPITAPH of By-Words.

HERE lies a round woman, who thought mighty odd

Ev'ry word the e'er heard in this church about God.

To convince her of God the good dean did endeavour;

But ftill in her heart fhe held nature more

clever.

Though he talk'd much of virtue, her head always run

Upon fomething or other fhe found better fun :

For

« PreviousContinue »