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Mine heir from forth the beggars of the world,
And dispossess her all.
How shail she be endow'd, If she be mated with an equal husband? Old Ath. Three talents, on the present; in future, all.
Tim. This gentleman of mine hath serv'd me long; To build his fortune I will strain a little, For 'tis a bond in men. Give him thy daughter : What you bestow, in him I'll counterpoise, And make him weigh with her.
Old Ath. Most noble lord, Pawn me to this your honour, she is his. Tim. My hand to thee; mine honour on my promise.
Luc. Humbly I thank your lordship: Never may That state or fortune fall into my keeping, Which is not ow'd to you!
[Exeunt LUCILIUS and old Athenian. Poet. Vouchsafe my labour, and long live your lordship!
Tim. I thank you; you shall hear from me anon:
Go not away.
Tim. Whither art going?
Apem. Right, if doing nothing be death by the law.
Tim. Wrought he not well, that painted it? Apem. He wrought better, that made the painter; and yet he's but a filthy piece of work.
Pain. You are a dog.
Apem. Thy mother's of my generation; What's she, if I be a dog?
Tim. Wilt dine with me, Apemantus?
Apem. No; I eat not lords.
Tim. An thou should'st, thou'dst anger ladies. Apem. O, they eat lords; so they come by great bellies.
Tim. That's a lascivious apprehension. Apem. So thou apprehend'st it: Take it for thy labour.
Tim. How dost thou like this jewel, Apemantus? Apem. Not so well as plain-dealing, which will not cost a man a doit.
Tim. What dost thou tnink 'tis worth?
Apem. Not worth my thinking. - How now, poet?
Poet. How now, philosopher?
Apem. Thou liest.
Poet. Art not one?
Poet. Then I lie not.
Apem. Then thou liest look in thy last work, where thou hast feign'd him a worthy fellow. Poet. That's not feign'd, he is so.
Apem. Yes, he is worthy of thee, and to pay thee for thy labour: He, that loves to be flattered, is worthy o'the flatterer. Heavens, that I were a lord!
Tim. What would'st do then, Apemantus? Apem. Even as Apemantus does now, hate a lord with my heart.
Tim. What, thyself?
Apem. That I had no angry wit to be a lord. Art not thou a merchant?
Mer. Ay, Apemantus.
Apem. Traffick confound thee, if the gods will
Painting is welcome.
The painting is almost the natural man;
The gods preserve you! Tim. Well fare you, gentlemen: Give me your hand :
We must needs dine together. Sir, your jewel
My lord, 'tis rated
As those, which sell, would give: But you well know,
Mer. No, my good lord; he speaks the common
Which all men speak with him.
Tim. Look, who comes here. Will you be chid? | not!
Jew. We will bear with your lordship.
He'll spare none. Tim. Good morrow to thee, gentle Apemantus! Apem. Till I be gentle, stay for thy good morrow; When thou art Timon's dog, and these knaves
Tim. Why dost thou call them knaves? thou know'st them not.
Apem. Are they not Athenians?
Apen. Then I repent not.
Jew. You know me, Apemantus.
Apem. Thou knowest, I do; I call'd thee by thy
Tim. Thou art proud, Apmantus.
Apem. Of nothing so much, as that I am not like Timon.
Mer. If traffick do it, the gods do it.
Apem. Traffick's thy god, and thy god confound thee!
Trumpets sound. Enter a Servant.
'Tis Alcibiades, and Some twenty horse, all of companionship. Tim. Pray entertain them; give them guide to [Exeunt some Attendants. You must needs dine with me: Go not you
Till I have thank'd you; and, when dinner's done, Show me this piece. I am joyful of your sights. Enter ALCIBIADES, with his company.
Most welcome, sir!
1 Lord. What time a day is't, Apemantus? Apem. Time to be honest.
1 Lord. That time serves still.
Apem. The most accursed thou, that still omit'st it. 2 Lord. Thou art going to lord Timon's feast. Apem. Ay; to see meat fill knaves, and wine heat fools.
2 Lord. Fare thee well, fare thee well.
Apem. Thou art a fool, to bid me farewell twice. 2 Lord. Why, Apemantus?
Apem. Shouldst have kept one to thyself, for I mean to give thee none.
1 Lord. Hang thyself.
Apem. No, I will do nothing at thy bidding; make thy requests to thy friend.
2 Lord. Away, unpeaceable dog, or I'll spurn thee hence.
Apem. I will fly, like a dog, the heels of the ass. [Exit.
1 Lord. He's opposite to humanity. Come, shall we in,
And taste lord Timon's bounty? he outgoes
2 Lord. He pours it out; Plutus, the god of gold,
All use of quittance.
The noblest mind he carries,
Hautboys playing loud musick. A great banquet served in; FLAVIUS and others attending; then enter TIMON, ALCIBIADES, LUCIUS, LUCULLUS. SEMPRONIUS, and other Athenian Senators, with VENTIDIUS, and Attendants. Then comes, dropping after all, APEMANTUS, discontentedly.
Ven. Most honour'd Timon, 't hath pleas'd the gods remember
My father's age, and call him to long peace.
To your free heart. I do return those talents,
O, by no means,
Honest Ventidius: you mistake my love;
I gave it freely ever; and there's none
If our betters play at that game, we must not dare
Ven. A noble spirit.
[They all stand ceremoniously looking on TIMON.
Nay, my lords, ceremony
Was but devis'd at first, to set a
[They sit. 1 Lord. My lord, we always have confess'd it. Apem. Ho, ho, confess'd it? hang'd it, have you not?
Tim. O, Apemantus!
you are welcome.
You shall not make me welcome :
I come to have thee thrust me out of doors.
Does not become a man, 'tis much to blame : -
Go, let him have a table by himself;
Apem. Let me stay at thine own peril, Timon; I come to observe; I give thee warning on't.
Tim. I take no heed of thee; thou art an Athenian; therefore welcome: I myself would have no power: pr'ythee, let my meat make thee silent.
Apem. I scorn thy meat; 'twould choke me, for
Ne'er flatter thee. O you gods! what a number
He cheers them up too.
I wonder men dare trust themselves with men :
Is the readiest man to kill him: it has been prov'd.
Were a huge man, I should fear to drink at meals; Lest they should spy my windpipe's dangerous
Great men should drink with harness on their throats.
Tim. My lord, in heart; and let the health go
2 Lord. Let it flow this way, my good lord.
A brave fellow ! - he keep his tides well.
than a dinner of friends.
Alcib. So they were bleeding-new, my lord, there's no meat like them; I could wish my best friend at such a feast.
Apem. 'Would all those flatterers were thine enemies then; that then thou might'st kill 'em, and bid me to 'em.
1 Lord. Might we but have that happiness, my lord, that you would once use our hearts, whereby we might express some part of our zeals, we should think ourselves for ever perfect.
Tim. O, no doubt, my good friends, but the gods themselves have provided that I shall have much help from you: How had you been my friends else? why have you that charitable title from thousands, did you not chiefly belong to my heart? I have told more of you to myself, than you can with modesty speak in your own behalf; and thus far I confirm you. O, you gods, think I, what need we have any friends, if we should never have need of them? they were the most needless creatures living, should we ne'er have use for them: and would most resemble sweet instruments hung up in cases, that keep their sounds to themselves. Why, I have often wished myself poorer, that I might come nearer to you. We are born to do benefits: and what better or properer can we call our own than the riches of our friends? O, what a precious comfort 'tis, to have so many like brothers, commanding one another's fortunes! O joy, e'en made away ere it can be born! Mine eyes cannot hold out water, methinks; to forget their faults, I drink to you. Apem. Thou weepest to make them drink, Timon.
2 Lord. Joy had the like conception in our eyes, And, at that instant, like a babe sprung up. Apem. Ho, ho! I laugh to think that babe a bastard.
3 Lord. I promise you my lord, you mov'd me much.
1 Lord. You see, my lord, how ample you are belov'd.
Musick. Re-enter Cupid, with a masque of Ladies as Amazons, with lutes in their hands, dancing, and playing.
Apem. Hey day, what a sweep of vanity comes They dance! they are mad women. this way!
Like madness is the glory of this life,
With poisonous spite, and envy. Who lives, that's
Depraved, or depraves? who dies, that bears
The Lords rise from table, with much adoring of
Set a fair fashion on our entertainment,
1 Lady. My lord, you take us even at the best. Apem. 'Faith, for the worst is filthy; and would not hold taking, I doubt me.
Tim. Ladies, there is an idle banquet Attends you: Please you to dispose yourselves. All Lad. Most thankfully, my lord.
Tim. Flavius, Flav. My lord. Tim.
[Exeunt Cupid, and Ladies.
The little casket bring me hither.
1 Lord. Where be our men?
O my friends, I have one word
Accept, and wear it, kind my lord.
1 Lord. I am so far already in your gifts, All. So are we all.
Serv. Please you, my lord, there are certain ladies most desirous of admittance.
Tim. Ladies? What are their wills?
Serv. There comes with them a forerunner, my lord, which bears that office, to signify their plea
Tim. I pray, let them be admitted.
and to all
Cup. Hail to thee, worthy Timon;
Enter a Servant.
Serv. My lord, there are certain nobles of the
Newly alighted, and come to visit you.
He commands us to provide, and give great gifts, And all out of an empty coffer.
Nor will he know his purse; or yield me this,
Happier is he that has no friend to feed,
I bleed inwardly for my lord.
Honour, and fortunes, keep with you, lord Timon! Tim. Ready for his friends.
[Exeunt ALCIBIADES, Lords, &c. Apem. What a coil's here! Serving of becks, and jutting out of bums! I doubt whether their legs be worth the sums That are given for 'em. Friendship's full of dregs: Methinks, false hearts should never have sound legs. Thus honest fools lay out their wealth on court'sies. Tim. Now, Apemantus, if thou wert not sullen, I'd be good to thee.
2 Lord. With more than common thanks I will receive it.
3 Lord. O, he is the very soul of bounty! Tim. And now I remember me, my lord, you gave Good words the other day of a bay courser I rode on it is yours, because you lik'd it! 2 Lord. I beseech you, pardon me, my lord, in
Tim. You may take my word, my lord; I know,
Enter a Senator, with papers in his hand.
Sen. And late, five thousand to Varro; and to
He owes nine thousand; besides my former sum,
Caphis, I say!
Apem. There will little learning die then, that day thou art hanged. This is to lord Timon; this to Alcibiades. Go; thou wast born a bastard, and thou'lt die a bawd.
Page. Thou wast whelped a dog; and thou shalt
Var. Serv. 'Twas due on forfeiture, my lord, six famish, a dog's death. Answer not, I am gone.
Isid. Serv. Your steward puts me off, my lord; And I am sent expressly to your lordship.
Tim. Give me breath :
do beseech you, good my lords, keep on;
[Exeunt ALCIBIADES and Lords.
Apem. Even so thou out-run'st grace. Fool, I will go with you to lord Timon's.
Fool. Will you leave me there?
Apem. If Timon stay at home. - You three scr' e three usurers?
All Serv. Ay; 'would they served us!