The Big Book of Duh: A Bathroom Book

Front Cover
Andrews McMeel Publishing, 2007 - Humor - 352 pages
If you are stupid, then you're too dumb to know it. If you're smart, then you are no doubt smart enough to doubt yourself." -Bob Fenster

The Big Book of Duh! is the perfect read regardless of where you happen to be sitting-think Uncle John's Bathroom Reader meets The Darwin Awards (without any of the dreary dead stuff).

Proving there is a lot of reading going on in suburbia's smallest room, more than 1.5 million copies of Uncle John's Bathroom Reader have been sold since its first publication in 1988. As the new water-closet contender, Bob Fenster continues his romp into areas of idiot intrigue by chronicling the folly and reckless abandon of the human race.

* Covering such topics as "My Favorite Morons," "It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time," "The Surprising Things People Don't Know," and "Dumb Plays in the Face of Fate," this compendium chronicles the densely inept and decidedly ignorant.

* Featuring outrageous new stories plus the best material from the previous Duh! books, this compilation is the ultimate collection of human stupidity.

From inside the book

Contents

II
5
IV
17
V
30
VI
45
VII
59
X
73
XI
88
XIII
96
XXIV
193
XXV
207
XXVI
221
XXVII
232
XXX
247
XXXI
259
XXXII
272
XXXIV
283

XIV
107
XV
124
XVII
137
XVIII
153
XX
167
XXIII
181
XXXV
293
XXXVI
306
XXXVII
320
XXXIX
329
Copyright

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Popular passages

Page 112 - Neighbours, the Taxes are indeed very heavy, and if those laid on by the Government were the only Ones we had to pay, we might more easily discharge them; but we have many others, and much more grievous to some of us. We are taxed twice as much by our Idleness, three times as much by our Pride, and four times as much by our Folly, and from these Taxes the Commissioners cannot ease or deliver us by allowing an Abatement. However let us hearken to good Advice, and something may be done for us; God...
Page 338 - In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.
Page 156 - Carswell were mediocre, there are a lot of mediocre judges and people and lawyers. They are entitled to a little representation, aren't they, and a little chance? We can't have all Brandeises, and Frankfurters, and Cardozos and stuff like that there.
Page 163 - The man who is denied the opportunity of taking decisions of importance begins to regard as important the decisions he is allowed to take. He becomes fussy about filing, keen on seeing that pencils are sharpened, eager to ensure that the windows are open (or shut), and apt to use two or three different-colored inks. The Age of Jealousy reveals itself in an emphasis upon seniority. "After all, I am still somebody.
Page 307 - I went to market with the money in my pocket, and brought back my purchases in a basket; now I take the money in the basket, and bring the things home in my pocket.
Page 298 - When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong.
Page 34 - telephone" has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us.
Page 157 - The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office.

About the author (2007)

Bob Fenster is the author of Duh! The Stupid History of the Human Race, Twisted, Laugh Off, and They Did What!? as well as three novels, two puzzle books, and one play. His writing has appeared in the "Washington Post," the "Wall Street Journal, Reader's Digest," and the "San Francisco Chronicle." He lives with his wife and three sons in Santa Cruz, Calif., when he's not touring his one-man show, "The Stupid History of the Human Race."

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