"Good woman," said the Curé, "I am afraid you have not rightly understood what the bells said to you." He rang them again; and then the poor widow heard clearly," Ne le prends pas: Ne le prends pas; "* for the drubbing and bad treatment she had received, had opened her eyes.

LXIV. MEDICINE.

Medicine has been defined to be the art or science of amusing a sick man with frivolous speculations about his disorder, and of temporising ingeniously till nature either kills or cures him.

LXV. MARCO DE LODI.

Marco de Lodi, having presented a sonnet of his own composition to Clement VII., the Pope found one of the lines in the first quatrain deficient in a syllable. "Do not let that disturb your Holiness," said the poet; "in the next you will probably find a syllable too much, which will balance the defect."

LXVI. M. DE GRAMMONT.

M. le Marechal de Grammont having gone, by order of the King, to visit the minister Morus, who was dangerously ill, the King asked him, on his return, how he found him. The Marechal answered, "Sire, I saw him die like a good Huguenot: what I think is most to be regretted is, that he should have died in a religion which is now as unfashionable as a peaked hat.”

LXVII. A MAN OF WORTH.

The Abbé de la Riviere was praising very highly the late Duke of Orleans, the uncle of Louis XII., in presence of his daughter. Among other things he said, that "he was a very wise and

Don't take him: Don't take him.

pious prince, and a man of great worth." «True,” replied Mademoiselle d'Orleans, "you ought to know that better than any one, for you have sold him often enough."

LXVIII. THE AMBASSADOR OF SIAM.

Madame de Seignelay reproaching the Siamese with having a plurality of wives, the ambassador replied, "Madame, if we could find at Siam wives as handsome as yourself, we should have but one; but as that cannot be, we must console ourselves by changing them occasionally."

LXIX. THE CANON OF ANGERS.

A Canon of Angers having invited several persons to dine upon a jour maigre, his servant told him he had been to market, and could find no fish but a salmon, which he had not ventured to take, because it had been bespoken by a counsellor. The Canon, placing his purse in his hand, replied, "There-go back-buy me the salmonand the counsellor."

LXX. RACAN.

Racan was a man of talent, and frequently said good things; but his voice was weak, and he spoke rather indistinctly. One day in a numerous company, when he was present, the conversation turned on some subject, which gave an opportu nity of introducing an agreeable story. When he had finished, seeing that the company, who probably had not heard it, did not laugh, he turned to Menage, who was sitting near him, and said, "I see plainly that these gentlemen have not understood me-translate me, if you please, into the vulgar tongue."

LXXI. M. DE BASSOMPIERRE.

While M. de Bassompierre was confined in the

Bastile, a Marquis, who was his fellow-prisoner, used to amuse him with an account of his exploits. He told him, among other things, that in a naval engagement he had himself killed 300 men in one vessel. "And I," rephed Bassompierre, "once slipped down a chimney in Switzerland, to visit a lady with whom I was in love." "How the deuce can that be," said the other, “when there are no chimneys in the country?” "Ah!" retorted Bassompierre, "when I allowed you quietly to kill your 300 men on board the vessel, you might for once have winked at my slipping down the chimney to visit a lady."

LXXII. CONTRARY WINDS.

A Venetian, who had never been out of Venice, and consequently was a very indifferent rider, having mounted, for the first time, on a restive horse, who would not advance, notwithstanding the application of the spur, pulled his handkerchief out of his pocket, and spreading it to the wind, said," Ah! I see the reason that we can't get on-the wind is against us.'

LXXIII. ALEXANDRINES.

Alexander of Paris, the first person who made use of French verses of twelve syllables, which have retained the name of Alexandrines, lived about the close of the 12th century.

LXXIV. A LUCKY HIT.

Two persons, playing for a considerable sum with a pair of dice, agreed that the person who threw the smallest number should be entitled to the stake. The first threw two aces, and claimed

• Some such anecdote may have suggested to Smollett the traverse course steered by Commodore Trunnion on his wedding day.

the money. The other stopped him, and contrived to throw the dice in such a manner, that, the one remaining above the other, only one ace was visible, and thus carried off the prize.

LXXV. PHYSICIANS.

Physicians were formerly ecclesiastics. It was only in 1452 that the Cardinal d'Etouteville, du ring his nunciate in France, obtained permission for them to marry.

LXXVI. WALLER.

Waller, the celebrated English poet, composed, in excellent Latin verse, a panegyric upon Cromwell during his Protectorate. Charles II. being restored in 1660, Waller went to present to him some verses he had composed in his praise. The King read them, and told him he had composed better verses in praise of Cromwell. "Sire," replied Waller, "we poets always succeed better in fiction than in truth."

LXXVII. M. DE SELLERY.

The King having sent to ask the Chancellor de Sellery, whether he was willing to submit to a trial, the Chancellor requested the person who brought the message to refer the King to the verse. of the Psalms,-"Enter not into judgment with thy servant, for in thy sight shall no man living be justified."

LXXVIII. ST JOHN AND ST PAUL.

Father preaching on the day of St John the Evangelist, said, there was a great difference between St John and St Paul; that the one was far more open and unreserved than the other;

for," said he, "St Paul affects mystery and concealment, and will communicate nothing of what he learned in heaven, while St John speaks

out, and conceals nothing." At these words Madame de Sevigné turned to me, and said, "Methinks he places St Paul very low, and St John very high ?"-"Oh," said I, "come and hear him on St Paul's day, and you will see that he will put St John low enough; he will prove to you that St Paul was wise and prudent in concealing the secrets of heaven, and St John very indiscreet in revealing them.”

LXXIX. LANGUAGES.

When one has acquired a certain reputation, he should never venture to speak a language he has not been accustomed to use, however well he may understand it. We lose too much by doing SO. A single mistake is sufficient to throw dis credit on our learning. I have composed several books in Italian, yet I never venture to speak it. I am told that the Emperor understands French perfectly; but he never speaks it.

LXXX. COUNT DE BRANCAS.

It is said that the Menalcas* of La Bruyere's work was the late Count de Brancas. He has forgotten two of the most extraordinary sallies of this man. The first is, that one day the Count de Brancas walking in St Germain de l'Auxerrois, M. de la Rochefoucault presented himself to speak to him. "God help you," said M. de Brancas, and walked on. M. de la Rochefoucault began to laugh, and at the same time prepared to address him again. "Is it not enough," said M. de Brancas, "that I have said 'God help you' already?These beggars are the most troublesome rascals !" -Rochefoucault laughed still louder, and after

The Absent Man.