Song

Who studied with me at the U

niversity of Gottingen,

niversity of Gottingen.

85

[Weeps, and pulls out a blue kerchief, with which he wipes his eyes; gazing tenderly at it, he proceeds

II

Sweet kerchief, check'd with heavenly blue,
Which once my love sat knotting in!—
Alas! Matilda then was true!

At least I thought so at the U

niversity of Gottingen,

niversity of Gottingen.

[At the repetition of this line he clanks his chains in cadence.

III

Barbs! Barbs! alas! how swift you flew,

Her neat post-wagon trotting in!

Ye bore Matilda from my view;
Forlorn I languish'd at the U

niversity of Gottingen,

niversity of Gottingen.

IV

This faded form! this pallid hue!
This blood my veins is clotting in,
My years are many-they were few
When first I entered at the U

niversity of Gottingen,
niversity of Gottingen.

There first for thee my passion grew,
Sweet, sweet Matilda Pottengen!
Thou wast the daughter of my tu
tor, law professor at the U
niversity of Gottingen,
niversity of Gottingen.

VI

Sun, moon and thou, vain world, adieu,
That kings and priests are plotting in;
Here doom'd to starve on water gru

el, never shall I see the U

niversity of Gottingen,

niversity of Gottingen.

[During the last stanza he dashes his head repeatedly against the walls of his prison; and, finally, so hard as to produce a visible contusion; he then throws himself on the floor in an agony. The curtain drops; the music still continuing to play till it is wholly fallen.

George Canning.

LYING

I DO confess, in many a sigh,

My lips have breath'd you many a lie,
And who, with such delights in view,
Would lose them for a lie or two?

Nay-look not thus, with brow reproving:
Lies are, my dear, the soul of loving!
If half we tell the girls were true,

If half we swear to think and do,
Were aught but lying's bright illusion,
The world would be in strange confusion!
If ladies' eyes were, every one,
As lovers swear, a radiant sun,
Astronomy should leave the skies,
To learn her lore in ladies' eyes!
Oh no!-believe me, lovely girl,

When nature turns your teeth to pearl,
Your neck to snow, your eyes to fire,
Your yellow locks to golden wire,
Then, only then, can heaven decree,
That you should live for only me,
Or I for you, as night and morn,
We've swearing kiss'd, and kissing sworn.

Strictly Germ-Proof

And now, my gentle hints to clear,
For once, I'll tell you truth, my dear!
Whenever you may chance to meet
A loving youth, whose love is sweet,
Long as you're false and he believes you,
Long as you trust and he deceives you,
So long the blissful bond endures;
And while he lies, his heart is yours:
But, oh! you've wholly lost the youth
The instant that he tells you truth!

Thomas Moore.

87

STRICTLY GERM-PROOF

THE Antiseptic Baby and the Prophylactic Pup

Were playing in the garden when the Bunny gamboled up; They looked upon the Creature with a loathing undisguised;

It wasn't Disinfected and it wasn't Sterilized.

They said it was a Microbe and a Hotbed of Disease;
They steamed it in a vapor of a thousand-odd degrees;
They froze it in a freezer that was cold as Banished Hope
And washed it in permanganate with carbolated soap.

In sulphureted hydrogen they steeped its wiggly ears; They trimmed its frisky whiskers with a pair of hard-boiled shears;

They donned their rubber mittens and they took it by the

hand

And 'lected it a member of the Fumigated Band.

There's not a Micrococcus in the garden where they play;
They bathe in pure iodoform a dozen times a day;
And each imbibes his rations from a Hygienic Cup-
The Bunny and the Baby and the Prophylactic Pup.

Arthur Guiterman.

THE LAY OF THE LOVER'S FRIEND

AIR-" The days we went a-gipsying."

I WOULD all womankind were dead,
Or banished o'er the sea;

For they have been a bitter plague
These last six weeks to me:
It is not that I'm touched myself,
For that I do not fear;

No female face hath shown me grace
For many a bygone year.

But 'tis the most infernal bore,

Of all the bores I know,

To have a friend who's lost his heart
A short time ago.

Whene'er we steam it to Blackwall,
Or down to Greenwich run,
To quaff the pleasant cider cup,
And feed on fish and fun;

Or climb the slopes of Richmond Hill,
To catch a breath of air:

Then, for my sins, he straight begins.
To rave about his fair.

Oh, 'tis the most tremendous bore,
Of all the bores I know,

To have a friend who's lost his heart
A short time ago.

In vain you pour into his ear
Your own confiding grief;
In vain you claim his sympathy,
In vain you ask relief;

In vain you try to rouse him by

Joke, repartee, or quiz;

His sole reply's a burning sigh,

And "What a mind it is!"

O Lord! it is the greatest bore,
Of all the bores I know,

To have a friend who's lost his heart
A short time ago.

Man's Place in Nature

I've heard her thoroughly described
A hundred times, I'm sure;

And all the while I've tried to smile,
And patiently endure;

He waxes strong upon his pangs,
And potters o'er his grog;
And still I say, in a playful way-
"Why you're a lucky dog!"

But oh! it is the heaviest bore,
Of all the bores I know,

To have a friend who's lost his heart
A short time ago.

I really wish he'd do like me
When I was young and strong;
I formed a passion every week,
But never kept it long.

But he has not the sportive mood
That always rescued me,

And so I would all women could

Be banished o'er the sea.

For 'tis the most egregious bore,

Of all the bores I know,

To have a friend who's lost his heart
A short time ago.

William E. Aytoun.

MAN'S PLACE IN NATURE

DEDICATED TO DARWIN AND HUXLEY

THEY told him gently he was made
Of nicely tempered mud,

That man no lengthened part had played

Anterior to the Flood.

'Twas all in vain; he heeded not,

Referring plant and worm,

Fish, reptile, ape, and Hottentot,

To one primordial germ.

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