palace or more immediate refidence, as mistress, from whence fhe difplays her greatness. But obferve, the Turtle has no brains, and not one animal of the brute creation more fagacious about the preservation of her offspring, which deftroys your hypothefis or new philofophy of your enlightened age and hemifphere. Matter was created for man, and man for his Creator. Let us take a fhort view of the greatness, wifdom and goodness of our Divine Author, and will no more seek for a fenfual, or God made of matter, to indulge our wickednefs and falfe conceptions. Let us confider every part, even the most trifling infect, (with the help of glaffes) `we shall evidently fee the divine pencil pointing out a thousand beauties. The herbs and flowers that fade in a day difplay numberless beauties, and we rife in a regular progreffion until we arrive at man, Image of his Great Creator. In him you will fee the Infinity of his God. In man you will contemplate your God. He is nothing less than vicegerent, commiffioned under the feal of his God to display his Greatness and rule with glory and honour. In man you will fee a profufion of all that can be wished for, both philofopher and gentleman of the faculty, find a labyrinth of amazements, which are impenetrable. If we view and contemplate the heavenly bodies, their immenfity and number, the unmeasurable space of the ftarry regions, which produce new worlds, when man's ingenuity improves and ftrengthens their telescopes to pierce through the immenfity of space and reach those vaft luminaries till then unknown,

and thought by fome to beat at too great a .diftance to borrow their light from the fun; we are loft in immenfity, where fhall we end?

Club. Immenfity has no affinity to man, who is nothing more than a mite in the scale of the universe, it may amufe the remaining frag ments of the old chriftian philofophy, our new philofophy; of this our enlightened age and hemifphere is grounded, on this unalterable and fundamental principle. Touch and enjoy: abfence is not known, and would be a crime in our new philofophy to mention, therefore, bring forth fubftantial matter, when you treat with a new philofopher of our enlightened age and hemifphere. Your five fenfes will produce mat ter which will meet with due refpect, and confidered meritorious, worthy reward: the old fpiritual philofophy is exploded, and in future. looked on, and who dare introduce it with contempt. A new philofopher of our enlightened. age and northern hemifphere, acknowledges himself a pig and requires to be confidered a pig, and in every fenfe of the word treated as a pig; this and only this will fhine forth the dignity of a new philofopher, of this our enlightened age and northern hemifpeere; and we have determined upon a refolution as foon as our advice has operated, which is, that a midwife immediately attend our moft high lord archbishop of Canterbury, who, through his great zeal for our new philofophy of our enlightened age and northern hemifphere, have brought on an indigeftion, or rather piled and pent up a whole troop of voracious neighbours in the womb of

a tre

a tremenduous belly, which threaten ferious confequences if not difengaged, relieved and fet free we have on receiving an embaffage from his lordfhip, commiffioned his lordship's hofts to a fafe midwife, ordering a proper clyfter of castor oil, and with the tincture of tantaradin gently rubbed over the pipe to encourage a titulation; all which are to be administered by the old woman, into the anus; which medicine will roufe his lordship to make ftrong efforts to, an abolition, and unfheathing his womb of fo large a group of favages; when we fhall wait on his lordship, praying his acceptance of precedence to our fociety of new philofophers, of our enlightened age and northern hemisphere; on his lordship's acceptance, we will in proceffion wait on their high mightineffes, praying their interefting themfelves with the legislative body of Great Britain, for inftalling his lordship with the fuperior dignity of cardinal, which high dignity will grace our Proteftant caufe, and being the first in the annals of the reformation, will give great energy and force, and draw fubordination to the banner of our new philofophy of our enlightened age and northern hemifphere; when his eminence will iffue his decree as follows. To all my fubftantializing children be it known: I Luther, cardinal, prieft, lord archbishop, metropolitan and primate of all England, with all and every part or parcel thereunto appertaining and belonging, empires, kingdoms, principalities, colonies, with all and every their appendages whenfoever, and wherefoever, might ap

pear

pear, only within the limitation of our great, wife, and benevolent mother, from whom and through whom we receive our being, and every bleffing we enjoy, expect, wish or covet, from this time forth for evermore, greeting. Be it my dear and beloved children, with whom I am in labour until now, known, that ye hold yourselves in readiness, according, and in due fubordination to this our mandate erected, built, and founded on the firm principle and bulwark of fubftantiality, proved, confented and allowed by the five fenfes; that is to fay, feeing or spying, hearing, tafting, fmelling and feeling; which are the principles that form and compose our new philofophy, of this our enlightened age and northern hemifphere. Item, be it known that we are approved of, and feJected by the unanimous and fubftantial body of new philofophers, of this our enlightened age and northern hemifphere, chief and prime Pig, and first in repute, to watch over, iffue decrees, and fet free from ftings and remorfe which infect and teaze the heart; alfo fhame and dif may which teaze the aforefaid, and rob, pilfer, and maim the injured captive: all and every restraint are by the aforefaid commiffion and authority fecluded; fo that peace, harmony, good-fellowship, jollity, merriment, mirth, laughter, funninels, and in a word every happiness and diverfion, with unremitted pleasure wherever we go. Item, No neighbour in future of the feathered race, to be plucked, or neighbour of the four-footed be fheared, but good manners and neighbourly agreement,

with voluptuous harmony reign free coft. Item, the extraordinary indulgence bequeathed unto the fhe-pigs, or new female philofophers of our enlightened age, and wherefoever our enlightened authority extends and commands reach, in addition to pure nature, in drefs is, a wreath of flowers about the head, and a jerkin or ftrait jacket or bandage, twelve inches in length, beginning under or below the breaft or paps, and finishing or ending above the mole or navel. The he or male pigs fomething fimilar to the jerkin, but different head-drefs, fay, a close, cotton cap. Item, to remove fcandal, mifconception or demur, and take away ftumblingblocks that may arife either through prejudice, mifconftruction, or malice and flander, that I, being firft in eminence in proteftantifm, fhould be fo in materialifm. Know ye, therefore, and be it decreed, that Proteftantifm protests and prohibits all Catholic or general laws that went and were received until that or their epoch, which we term vagaries and whims of fpirit, dreams of old women, in order to give place to fubftantiality, which firm both proteftantifm and materialism are grounded upon, and are Coufin Germans, fpringing from one ocean of fweetneffes. Proteftantifm is founded upon this unalterable and fubftantial fact; that is to fay, every man adheres to his pofitive opinion, which proceeds from his brain. Materialism believes, as they do, in the brain. Proteftantifm was adopted by Martin Luther, when the morning dawn of our Bright Luminary, new Philofophy, glimmered and peeped through the black regions