of Dr. Hassall's investigations, and Mr. Scholefield's billbut as for the poor, God help them! They pay dear for what they have, and never, by any chance, have it pure ; and as they can't afford to have suspected articles analysed, they must go to the wall as of old. We want a little touch of French despotism in these matters. Every drop of milk brought into Paris is tested at the barriers by the lactometer, to see if the 'Iron-tailed cow' has been guilty of diluting it—if so, the whole of it is remorselessly thrown into the gutter-the Paris milk is very pure in consequence. If a tradesman adulterates any article of food offered for sale, he is first fined, and then made publicly to confess his fault, by means of a large placard in his window, setting forth the exact nature of the trick he has played upon his customers. Imagine some of our leading tradesmen obliged to sit in sackcloth and ashes, and suffer this moral pillory! One or two rogues thus exposed would have a marvellous effect in keeping the sand out of the sugar, and the burnt beans out of the coffee, &c., &c."

1

"Now then, old fellow, as you have worked yourself round into a good humour again, take a weed?”

"Not the slightest objection in life, for it's the only thing to be got unsophisticated-there is plenty of bad tobacco, it is true—but we know it is tobacco. There are many tales going, about the fine qualities of British tobacco grown in the Camberwell cabbage beds — but it's all fudge."

"Come," said I, "let's take a constitutional in the fresh air after this lecture?"

"Fresh air, indeed," all our friend's savageness was evidently reviving. "Fresh air with every gully hole sending

forth streams of sulphuretted hydrogen, and sulphuric acid, impregnating all the water-where on earth do you find your fresh air?"

Where he would have ended there is no telling, had not Bob slily tempted him with a thumping principe, on which his mouth closed with immense satisfaction to all parties concerned.

THE ARTIFICIAL MAN.

WHILE lounging, the other day, in a medical library, I chanced to take up a little volume, the odd title of which led me to dip into it-" Bigg on Artificial Limbs." I had heard of the skilful, anatomical mechanician of Leicester Square, whom the Queen delighted to honour with commissions for cunningly devised limbs for wounded soldiers during the Crimean war, but never realised to myself the art with which man can eke out the defects of nature until I glanced over this little volume! the contents of which so struck me, that I was determined to see for myself how far that cunning biped man can simulate the handiwork of our great mother. I was received courteously, and on explaining the nature of my errand, an assistant was sent through the different workshops to satisfy my curiosity.

A very few minutes' conversation with my conductor left the impression upon my mind that, instead of having any profound respect for Nature, he looked upon her as sometimes rather in the way than otherwise; for, happening to ask him playfully, as a kind of starting question, with how small a modicum of humanity he could manage to work, "Sir," said he, very seriously, "we only want

the vital principle; give us nervous centres and sound viscera, and we find all the rest."

"But," said I, not prepared for this liberal offer, "suppose a man had only three inches of stump!"

"Three inches of stump!" he replied, contemptuously, "with that allowance we could do anything. There is," said he, "somewhere in Ireland, a gentleman born without limbs, who goes out hunting in a clothes-basket strapped on his horse's back. If we could only get hold of him, his friends, in six weeks, would not know him.”

An inspection of my friend's ateliers, certainly, went far to justify the confident spirit in which his assistant spoke. I soon found out that there are first, second, and third-class limbs, however, as of everything else.

"What! said I, "do you make banisters as well as legs," pointing to a shelf-full neatly turned and painted. "Banisters! my dear sir," he replied, a little hurt, "these are our Chelsea pensioners!"

And on a closer examination such they proved to be. Here was the hard third-class fact simple and unadorned. "And these buckets?" I rejoined, pointing to some scores of hollow wooden cones placed one within the other.

"Bucket's the word!" said he, reaching one down, and screwing a banister into its lower end. "These are our Chelsea pensioners complete. But this is nothing to what they have in store at Chelsea Hospital. During the war we could not make them fast enough, and they were obliged to apply to the mop-makers. Fact," said he, seeing the surprise in our eyes-" and arms, too! You should see the rows and rows stored on the shelves:

-their hooks hanging out like so many hundred dozen of umbrellas. Government can only afford hooks for soldiers and sailors; but officers who are not able to pay can get new legs and arms of the very best construction at the expense of a grateful nation, by simply applying at the Horse Guards."

All the while this serio-comic conversation was going on, a workman in the coolest possible manner was working away at a most delicate little leg that would not have come off second best in the Judgment of Paris-a faultless Balmoral boot, and the daintiest silk stocking covered proportions that Madame Vestris might have envied.

"These," said my companion, "are some of our firstclass goods. Would you like to see the mechanism ?— Goodge, pull down the stocking." With that the workman bared the limb, whilst my companion put it through its paces. "This, you see, is our patent knee-cap and patella, and this the new vulcanised india-rubber tendonAchilles; here, in the instep, you will observe a spiral spring elevating the toes, and if you will just observe (opening a little trap-door in the back of the calf), here is an ingenious contrivance by which the bending of the knee elevates the front part of the foot, thus allowing it full play to swing forward clear of the ground."

Certainly it was an admirable contrivance.

"And can a man or woman progress easily with that arrangement?" I said.

"Do you know Lady "Yes."

-?" said he,

Nothing the matter there?" he rejoined, interroga

tively.